Lame Excuse

Aha! More musings on the components of a successful relationship.

This tune first saw the light of day (well, actually it was dark and nighttime, but you know what I mean) at Dan's fabulous 2004 Halloween bash. Then I decided to record it for RA Rosenberg's annual art-in-progress party, since the two other possible tunes I wrote were, ahmmm, much more in progress than I liked.

The whole character of the song changed during the recording. The vocal was originally an octave higher, and the accompaniment was a cheery acoustic guitar. While I was working on the new words, though (the original words from the first performance were lost on the way back from Halloween; only the first verse and the chorus remain from that version), I noticed that I liked the sort of vaguely sinister tone of the low rumble I was using to test out the rhythm of the words without killing my voice. Rachel Henseley and marg were called in to consult, and firmly approved of the Leonard Cohen-esque approach. So there it is.

Lame Excuse
(c) Mark Frey, 2005

Looks like wedding bells are ringing
For some kid you barely know at work
You'd rather die than do the chicken dance with strangers
but you don't wanna look like a jerk

so when you get that invitation
you know you can count on me
it's guaranteed I'll have a headache
a project way-past due or a messed-up knee

Let me be your lame excuse
Your professional party pooper
A wet blanket on demand
Stick in the mud at your command
Let me be your lame excuse

And here's your big high school reunion
reliving days you were you were glad to forget
now if this were a John Cusack movie you'd be wonderfully sentimental
but it hasn't happened yet
still there's no need to worry
you can weasel out of it and I'll take the fall
cause I bet they'll throw me out for taking a swing
at your old boyfriend in the study hall

Let me be your lame excuse
Your professional party pooper
An embarrassment on demand
No social grace at your command
Let me be your lame excuse

Aunt Millie's daughter's graduation
I was stuck at work so late
during the parish barbecue, I got abducted by aliens
do you think it was fate?
annoying friend won't let you off the phone
I practice French Horn at full blast
family reunion where your Grandma talks about her corns
I'll get an illness fast!

Let me be your lame excuse
Your professional party pooper
A wet blanket on demand
Stick in the mud at your command
an asocial sonofabitch I fear
but it's all for you my dear
and that 's how I'm gonna stay
your Uninvite of Dorian Grey

Let me be your lame excuse